Sometimes it's time to change course
In the last 5 years my views on parenting have changed.
Or should I say, my view on what makes a good parent has changed.
When BigBoy #1 was BabyBoy #1 and then LittleBoy #1 he altered my thoughts on parenting.
I discovered that no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get him to sit still and play with a bucket of toys.
I couldn't keep him from "being physical".
I battled biting, hitting, tantrums.
The things I was certain I wouldn't have to deal with.
Because before I was a mom, I knew I could handle anything my kid could throw at me as I mentioned here.
Prayers, tears, discipline, pleading, time-outs...
Sometimes none of it seemed to work.
I had ideas about what I would and would not allow.
No McDonalds, no artificial colors and flavors, no video games, no Tom and Jerry... :)
I have learned that a mark of a good parent is adaptation.
The majority of the things I was stuck on were formed in my mind before I was a parent.
It's sort of like telling someone what you MUST see in New York based on all the info you've accumulated online or from other first-hand accounts.
Oh, but by the way, you've never BEEN to New York.
You have a good idea of what it looks like, you've heard stories, you know what people say you must check out.
But you'll never be a good tour guide until you've experienced New York.
Until you've had to adapt your course based on traffic, the Statue of Liberty being shut down for renovations, the Broadway play being sold out.
Those are the things that make you good at your job.
You can roll with the punches, figure out an alternative that is as good, just different.
Now that's not to say you shouldn't have ideas about how you want to parent.
There are some things that aren't worth compromising.
Some battles are worth fighting.
I've learned to take into consideration my parenting ideas/expectations, weigh them against what the immediate outcome will be for my child vs. the long-term goal I have set.
If the outcome allows me to still achieve the goal (even it's through a detour or a short-cut) without compromise, then maybe it's time for me to adapt.
We, however, will not compromise on respecting others, obedience, honoring God and parents amongst other things.
Have you ever when have you had to adapt your parenting style/method?
What are things you've stuck with even though the battle is long and hard?
Or should I say, my view on what makes a good parent has changed.
When BigBoy #1 was BabyBoy #1 and then LittleBoy #1 he altered my thoughts on parenting.
I discovered that no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get him to sit still and play with a bucket of toys.
I couldn't keep him from "being physical".
I battled biting, hitting, tantrums.
The things I was certain I wouldn't have to deal with.
Because before I was a mom, I knew I could handle anything my kid could throw at me as I mentioned here.
Prayers, tears, discipline, pleading, time-outs...
Sometimes none of it seemed to work.
I had ideas about what I would and would not allow.
No McDonalds, no artificial colors and flavors, no video games, no Tom and Jerry... :)
I have learned that a mark of a good parent is adaptation.
The majority of the things I was stuck on were formed in my mind before I was a parent.
It's sort of like telling someone what you MUST see in New York based on all the info you've accumulated online or from other first-hand accounts.
Oh, but by the way, you've never BEEN to New York.
You have a good idea of what it looks like, you've heard stories, you know what people say you must check out.
But you'll never be a good tour guide until you've experienced New York.
Until you've had to adapt your course based on traffic, the Statue of Liberty being shut down for renovations, the Broadway play being sold out.
Those are the things that make you good at your job.
You can roll with the punches, figure out an alternative that is as good, just different.
Now that's not to say you shouldn't have ideas about how you want to parent.
There are some things that aren't worth compromising.
Some battles are worth fighting.
I've learned to take into consideration my parenting ideas/expectations, weigh them against what the immediate outcome will be for my child vs. the long-term goal I have set.
If the outcome allows me to still achieve the goal (even it's through a detour or a short-cut) without compromise, then maybe it's time for me to adapt.
We, however, will not compromise on respecting others, obedience, honoring God and parents amongst other things.
What are things you've stuck with even though the battle is long and hard?
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