Babies, Brownies and Blessings

Merry Christmas! I am not celebrating the day as I imagined as we have one child under the weather. I find myself plucked from the noisy festivities and instead experiencing the quiet of a sleepy afternoon. No matter how one plans, there is not escaping the facts of life. While I would rather be surrounded by those I love, I'm finding some joy in my quiet afternoon with Christ. Sometimes we need to be taken out of the busyness to experience the true meaning of life, and this Christmas season. Jesus Christ. He came to THIS earth, as a baby, for ME. Because no matter how hard I try, I can never be good enough to earn my salvation. The junk in my life, however hidden, trivial, or unnamed, separates me from my God. However blatant, ugly and unforgivable. I deserve none of what was given. I have received all that was offered. Jesus Christ, son of God, given because He loves me. And he loves you too. He's particularily fond of you, as William P. Young wrote in The Shac...

I think I like surprises. And gifts. I say "think" because I never quite realized it until recently. Surprises and gifts add some pressure and expectation to those who love me so I've been reluctant to classify myself as one of "those" people. Luckily I don't require big gifts, though, so maybe it's ok after all. Bri and I have been married 11 years now. Most "real" dating ended long before kids as we settled into marital bliss. While that sounds facetious, it is not. I wouldn't trade the comfort of our love for anything. Now that our children are a bit older, however, I've been itching for some romance. And so has my man, apparently. Wednesday I was surprised with the most perfect and wonderful Christmas gift: tickets to see Les Miserables for that night! Not only had Bri found tickets on Craigslist, purchased and wrapped them, he arranged for his folks to have the kids overnight, took the night off work and made sure...

Picture perfect is redefined when children are present. Instead of a harmonious family joyfully getting a Christmas tree it's a moment in which all are together and hopefully none are crying. Freezing hands, cold cheeks, hungry tummies all accompanied us on our Christmas tree adventure today. Our expectations were realistic and we enjoyed the time together as a family, marked though it was by normal kid-behavior. We've gotten smarter and kept things pretty short. We picked the first decent tree we saw instead of searching for the perfect one. It was a great time, have a lovely balsam to show for it and some pictures we can look back on and reminisce about the good old days. That's the one! And Claire is really excited about it... Bri muscling a dull saw blade My strong men Caleb helping hold the tree while it got "shook". I love the grins on the men's faces. Merry Christmas! Cutting open the Christmas tree Chocolate dipped pretzel...

There are so many little choices we make each day. Some are of consequence, others are trivial. It would seem that during times like the Christmas season, when there are gifts to buy and limited funds to use, the opportunity to be honest sneaks up more frequently. The temptation to say "Oh, it was their mistake" or "too bad for them, not my problem" when we get "long-changed" is always nudging more strongly than the inclination to turn around and correct the error. At Target today I discovered a Target gift card and another rewards card in my cart when I got to the check out. At first I thought it had fallen out of my purse because I had the same rewards card. After checking out my wallet it was apparent that the cards were not mine. My first thought was "Oh, my lucky day, I can just use this gift card and see what's on it!" Then I realized that was dishonest and my integrity was worth more than the $5 or $10 on that card. The reward...

There have been interludes of my life as a mom that have been marked with a sort of boredom. Not a, there's-nothing-to-do-I'm-so-bored type boredom, it's more vague than that. It's a general sense of never completing anything or having something of purpose to do. Not being able to measure and state with satisfaction that I accomplished...anything. My days are marked by piles of laundry that momentarily shrink only to have them grow again. Dishes that were dirty, now clean, now dirty again. A floor that is usually mopped but never clean. In fact, I am always looking for the perfect time to mop my floor and was saying such to a friend who wisely responded: There's no such thing as a good time to clean the floor. That oddly set me free from the search of finding the right time and I'm settling on any time I can. With children at several ages of toddler and childhood we are always second-guesssing our parenting. We try to be consistent but consistently fe...

One of the things on my list when on my weekend shopping spree was some new perfume. I had a particular one in mind and was scouting the best price. From Perfumania to Nordstrom Rack, Macy's to Bloomingdales I went in search of a bargain. The perfume I was coveting was Light Blue by Dolce and Gabbana and I couldn't get enough of the smell. It somehow reminds me of the anniversary weekends I have spent with my man and mmm...it makes my heart happy. Nordstrom Rack proved the best bang for my buck and with glee I plucked it off the shelf and turned over my hard earned money. Minutes later I ripped open the package and spritzed some on me. Um...this smells different...I thought. I asked Ang to smell it and she said different but still good. I couldn't get over the musky smell because I remembered it being light and almost fruity. I got home and started doing some research. I was wondering if perhaps it had gone bad...or they changed the formula? I clicked on a p...

At the risk of sounding ungrateful during this time of remembering those we're grateful for I have to salute my babysitter. I am thankful for her. She saves my day when I can't take one more minute. Need an example? Today all I heard and felt were the screams and pokes and proddings of my three little ones. Every time I turned around someone was hurt or hungry or...something that made them cry  (and I still don't know what that thing was). Not my kid but a PERFECT example of what my day looked and felt like. I had truly reached my whits end and when my brilliant husband tossed out the idea of a babysitter. He was on his way to work and could do nothing for me but offer extremely ingenious ideas. 3 texts later and I had a sitter that could spell me within the hour. Now THAT is something to be thankful for! I left, she was happy, they were happy. All went well until I walked in again and triggered the whines by my very presence. But a break is an amazing t...

The weekend before Thanksgiving is always spent eagerly awaiting the call that Bri got a deer. We love venison and usually enjoy it all year 'round. The guys typically do quite well and fill our freezers. So far there's been very little activity and no deer even seen but there are many days to go. Which means many days of me in the house with my naughty beloved children. They are delightful when kept busy but can be a handful when home-bound which we were this weekend because BabyGirl had a fever. Somehow the circumstances were conducive to a very productive day in the kitchen! The kids were underfoot constantly but by the end of the day my counter and fridge (and their tummies) were full of food... Lefse, bread, caramel rolls, crockpot lasagna, cookie dough, and beef stew. Don't get any crazy ideas that this is my norm, I seldom accomplish so much in a week! But it's nice to have one of those days and I'm certain the snowfall contributed. It just makes ...

He taught us everything we know. Showed us what we didn't. Redefined love. Introduced us to exhaustion. Made us appreciate uninterrupted sleep. With joy we listen to his laughter  and revel in the silence of his slumber. He ushered in a new definition of family. God knew him before he was born. And chose us for him. We are forever grateful. Celebrating Samual James today...6 years old. We love you, Big Boy, and are so proud of you! Sam with his brother and cousins opening his BeyBlade stadium from Papa and Nannie! What's in the bag? Uh oh...it's a Packer shirt...and so it begins that I can no longer dictate what sports teams he likes... Bakugan battle arena! With Dad, Alyssa, Caleb, Uncle Jason, Claire, Auntie Kini and Maddie Blowing out a backwards six! Daddy and the boys... Claire got extra pretty for Sam's big day!

DIY (Do It Yourself) projects don't usually make the top of my list. I can't say I'm terribly talented in this area and I have minimal imagination. My husband, on the other hand, is a total DIY-er. In fact, I feel a bit inferior because of all he can do...but my issues (and his awesomeness) are not the topic at hand. :) A few years ago when we were cutting out sugar and artificial colors and flavors (to keep our kids from going crazy) I started looking at labels. I was amazed at how much of our foods had junk in it. One of the most confusing things to me was how pure vanilla extract could have sugar in it and still be called pure. Every single pure vanilla I came across had sugar or some derivative of it. Even Watkins! Then I came across a blog at Heavenlyhomemakers.com on how to make your own vanilla  and I thought I'd give it a shot because it looked so easy! And it definitely was as there are only 2 ingredients: vanilla beans and vodka. The only...

This weekend I was blessed to spend about 30 hours (not like I was counting) with my dear friend, Angie. Ang and I suffered through toughed out nursing school together and became fast friends our junior year. She always seems to know what I'm thinking, what I'm wishing and what I need. Cards and phone calls from her have pulled me through many tough times and she has been there to celebrate the wonder in my life. Our first children are 10 months apart and her last and my middle are 3 months apart. She's my beloved soul sister, or as Anne of Green Gables would say, we are kindred spirits. Enough mush and on to the good stuff... Saturday we met up and started our weekend away at the Mall of America. We shopped and shopped and shopped some more. No long lunch for us, mall food and we were off again! 6 hours and twice as many bags later we made our way to the hotel. (*just a side note, always buy your candles last on a marathon spree, they get heavy F.A.S.T) Upo...

Daylight Savings time has always been a challenge in our home. We have the most hard-wired early wakers known to man. If we put them to bed later, they wake up earlier. There is nothing that changes their sleep patterns. Along comes Fall Back. A delight to every teenager, college student or person without little ones. A miserably early morning (and mornings for weeks to come) for those of us with children, who work nights (and had to work the extra hour) or with animals that can't tell time. Tonight is one such night in which I'm ready to turn the clocks back ahead, say it's 6:30pm, and send them to bed incredibly early. Unfortunately I can't justify a 5:30pm bedtime, but I'm close. In just the last two minutes I've heard amidst all the screams and tears : Mom, Sam pulled my pants off! Mom, did you know that fart starts with F? Mom, Sam hiiiiiitttttttt meeeeeeeeeee....wahwahwahwahwah... Mom, Caleb's hitting my face (to which he responds...I ...

October is my favorite month of the year and once again, it flew by. Marked by gorgeous color-changing vegetation and perfect temps, we find ourselves outside every chance we get. This month also hosted our 11 year anniversary and my man's 32nd birthday. It turned BabyGirl's babbling into words and turned on the tantrums. The big boys enjoyed the dark evenings with flashlights and cozy coats exploring the backyard in the cool hours. I said goodbye to the lump that was causing some remaining suspicion and welcomed the good news that it was benign and the joy of  a really good nap or two during the recovery. Grandma Kerri's visit left some very happy kids. BigBoy #1 left night-time Pull-ups behind and with it, a happy mother who finally, after nearly 6 years, who is now only buying "diapers" for two. Happy November to you all and may all the glories of this Fall be easily retreived as the winter wonder (as in, I wonder how long it's going to last!...

A couple weeks ago I ordered a few things from Herberger's online This purse was too adorable to resist and I had a great coupon (of course it was on sale, too!).  BabyGirl needed a fall sweatshirt so I got her this Columbia fleece.  Lastly, I was running out of mascara so I grabbed this Clinique mascara. My long-awaited package arrived with my treasures...and a sample of this: It's Lancome's Youth Activating Concetrate. Yep, anti-wrinkle cream. It got me wondering, which of my items made them think I was in need of this little wonder? Did I buy a old lady mature woman's purse? The mascara? Perhaps the fleece jacket in size 24 month told them more than anything. I can hear them now: I bet this woman is tired, she's ordering a 24 month jacket... her kids must be so naughty she doesn't dare take them out in public. Let's add a sample of Youth Activating Cream, just in case she's as haggered as I think she is I have no idea but I will say this: it actua...

Krispy Kreams Twerps Sleep Itty bitty sleeping babies Date Nights (on a whim!) Cheap Gas My grandparents   Campfires on crisp, cool nights

Every now and then I get to know someone well enough to find out about their "thing". I'm just not a foot person I'm not big on letting someone drink from my cup I get so grossed out by (insert item here) I can hardly stand it Just can't do it, that's not my thing I have a thing about my house being a certain way I only eat organic food I am not a fast-food person ...and the list could go on and on. Some people wear their "thing" on their sleeve. It's the first thing you find out about them. It's what sets them apart, makes them special. As I've matured gotten older I have realized my having "thing"s can make other people's lives harder. I'm noticing how inconvenient it is for others when I'm picky or particular. That everything becomes about me and my "thing" and whether or not they can or should accomodate it. What used to be cool in my self-obssessed brain I now see as an imposition on...

Last weekend we got away. Well, not exactly the get-away in the picture but get away we did! Thanks to my amazing in-laws (MIL, FIL, SIL and BIL) my man and I got to relive the glory years for 2 whole nights! We had truly wonderful time and while we wouldn't change a thing about life with three kids, it was a delightful time of just us enjoying each other. It's nice to know you've still go it. That life, kids, jobs haven't distracted you to the point of not knowing each other, or caring about the heart of the other. Knowing that we do still have things in common, our goals and dreams complement each other. (Of note, we had a great time with another couple on Saturday night, it felt so good to laugh so hard that our cheeks hurt the next day!) It was also important for us to have some uninterrupted time to talk about the kids. I know that's supposed to be taboo when on a date but I don't necessarily agree. Parenting takes a plan of attack...

It can be hard to maintain a teachable spirit. If I'm in the mood, I can take instruction really well. Unfortunately I'm not usually in any sort of receptive mood when shopping the aisles of Target, children in tow. It is always a survival mission. Get in, get the goods, get out, hopefully without losing a child or having one get hurt. There are some lessons children don't get unless they learn the hard way. For example, keeping their fingers away from the wheels when on the bottom of the cart. (Great parenting, no, but remember, we're in survival mode.) All the words in the world won't make the impression in their little minds like a wheel impression on their little hands. Not the way I'd prefer to teach but there are natural consequences and they work better than mine do. So when the Target employee decides they need to take my child's well-being into their own hands, I get a little...irritated. Yes, I have told them to keep their hands away. ...

It's a topic that keeps coming up around me. No one seems unaffected by it. Some complain about more than others. For some its an excuse. Others, an unquestioned (and often highly praised) way of life. Yet others are battling it, trying to find a balance. I'm not big on the "I'm just so busy" excuse/mantra. As a family, we try to avoid that but I've found that just makes you look like you somehow have more hours in the day than everyone else. Nevermind that we both work off-shifts and are constantly sleep-deprived. Have three young children constantly underfoot. A home to care for, projects to see to, finances to keep in check. Church, school, soccer, swimming lessons. Friends, family, co-workers, bosses. Bible studies, leading worship, playdates (which should be re-labeled "work-dates" but that's another blog). Sound just like your list? (And I'm sorry, I really just told you, without using the actual words, that I'm just...

Claire is learning to say a few things and I was so proud... but she ends the video like a true 15 month old!

The  tears were short-lived. A good cry and a nap were balm to this Mama's heart yesterday. By noon I was reveling in the quiet that is my home with one less kid. With nobody to fight with, BigBoy #2 settled in and played quietly, sat on my lap or visited the neighbors. BabyGirl squawked her way through the day, enjoying the undivided attention. A batch of caramel rolls, bread, cookies and homemade tomato soup (courtesy of my man) filled up the afternoon. BigBoy #1 came home, excited about his first day with stories of having to pee three times (he held it during music class), enjoying cold lunch with his friends (but he forgot he had a sandwich and only ate the snacks!), rest time with a new mat to lay on, and kids who "snuck in" some soccer cards during recess (ALREADY sneaking things  past the teacher?!?). He made up for the times he missed saying "I'm hungry" during the day and piled it all into the 4 hours I had with him. The boys fought over w...

It's irrational that I'm still crying a hour after dropping BigBoy #1 at Kindergarten. He was so excited. I was so excited. He was fine when we left. I was not fine when we left. There's no fear that he will miss me. Or that he will hate being at school. Or that the other kids will be mean to him. I'm certain he will thrive, he has been ready for months now. Yet the tears stream soundlessly on my cheeks. Tears of gratefulness. Tears of missing him. Tears of the knowledge that time is passing and this is the beginning of bigger goodbyes. Tears of knowing I can't control what he sees and hears 8 hours out of the day. Tears of love... For everything there is a season under the sun. We are in a new season and and thankful BigBoy#1 is under the Son.

...will himself be refreshed. An excerpt from Proverbs that has been bouncing around in my head since I read it. It's so contrary to the common approach to life which sounds more like he who is refreshed will then refresh others. Are we missing the point? With a self-focus and what-about-me attitude we have it all wrong. It explains why so many of us feel empty. Our quest for the ever illusive "more time" we end up pulling away from everything. More time equals less refreshement, loneliness and discontent because we are searching for our answer in the wrong place. We are doing the opposite of what we should be when we isolate and protect our time for me. Instead it suggests there is refreshment in offering yourself, encouragement in encouraging others. The context of this passage is important lest we think it's telling us to drain ourselves completely and have no boundaries. One man gives freely, yet gains even more; another withholds unduly but com...