Babies, Brownies and Blessings

There's been a recurring theme in my reading material lately. Random articles , current Bible study , other blogs ... They've all been intersecting at one point: Speculation. It's a tough subject. It has to do with our thoughts. Where our imaginations lead us. Taking what we know and adding what we think. I don't know about you but what I think isn't always even close to accurate. I send a text to a friend and don't hear back. "Is she busy?" "Did I say something wrong the last time I saw her?" "I'm not really in her league anyway, it wouldn't be surprising if I never hear back..." Now it doesn't matter why she really didn't respond because I think I have it all figured out. And I'm hurt because of it. And feeling a little low on the self-esteem scale. It's not her problem, it's mine. At work we all deal with coworkers and likely some sort of "customer". How easy is it for ...

Most of us wouldn't claim to be lazy. We work hard. Have busy lives. DayPlanners filled with proof of the chaotic pace of our lifestyles. The trouble with lazy is this: It can be masked by busyness. I've noticed lately a few areas where I'm taking the busy way out. The kids want to play a game... I'm too busy lazy. My husband wants a few minutes of uninterrupted time... I'm too busy lazy. There is extra stuff in every room that we don't need... I'm too busy lazy to sort it and get it to Goodwill. It's easier to have stuff to do than do the things you don't want to do. It's hard to put my "to do" list on the back burner. My things are just too important. And I'm too lazy to make the effort sometimes. So I'm trying to be less busy lazy. I'm sitting with my kids more. "Working" on the computer less. I'm taking those few minutes in the morning to love on my husband. And that stuff in the...

There are a few emotions/situations I avoid at all cost. Awkwardness. Embarrassment. Confrontation. They cause my blood pressure to rise. My rate of breathing increases. My heart starts to pound in my chest. It's taken me a few years to stomach The Office. Funny show. Love the characters. Makes me so nervous and anxious while anticipating the words that Michael will say  next, to the point of channel-flipping! If it's a particularly awkward episode I'll just have Bri give me the synopsis and forgo watching. And I've heard the original British version is even more awkward! Yikes! When American Idol first came on I tried to watch it and found I couldn't. There were too many people hoping they were good and finding out (quite rudely at times) that they weren't fit for anything except the butt of a joke on television. Seriously, I feel their pain in that moment! So I don't watch. Ever. I love music, I love to sing, I love to listen to other ...

It's one of those days where I'm wondering what my kids did to deserve me. Not a good kind of deserving. The "I'm going to freak out on you if you so much as think about saying *enter naughty word here* again" kind of deserving. My attitude towards them is poor and I know it. I'm wondering if by putting it in writing I will realize the pettyness of it all. 1 full cup of water spilled. 1 full cup of chocolate milk spilled. Disobedience. No naps for big kids. Little naps for BabyGirl. Not listening. Constantly asking for food. Hot sauce for naughty words. Disobedience. I said disobedience twice and that's not a typo. It's a very disobedient day around here today. This too shall pass. One day I will miss this. I know I will. But today... God needs to give me an attitude adjustment since it is blaringly apparent today that I can only change mine. All the time I've spent trying to force encourage a change in my children's att...

BabyGirl is changing her sleeping pattern. More specifically, her sleeping position. She has taken to sleeping on her tummy but there's a little glitch. Once there, she's not sure that she wants to go right to sleep. This results in a very wet, drooly sheet where she eventually lays her head to rest. We've had a few rough nights as she's adapting, too. She doesn't know how to flip back over onto her back but flips right back to belly if I offer a helping hand. I find myself monitor-watching... I must confess, I'd rather be sleeping. In attempt to discourage this behavior I have swaddled her tightly and snugged another blanket around her. As quickly as Houdini she has her arms out and she's flopped to her belly. So for now we'll just embrace the change and appreciate the value of video monitors!

When the house is quiet children tucked in bed frustrations have eased tension has ceased... I am struck by the beauty of each sleeping child with lashes resting on their cheeks even easy breathing pink plump lips begging one last goodnight kiss... It is now that time could stop Lest they grow and I no longer get to kiss the sleeping faces of my beautiful, peaceful babies... Oh the wonderous gifts of God.

On our way home from church today Sam said, "Mom, Caleb's teacher is really pretty. I can't stop looking at her." Caleb's Sunday School teacher is 17. And quite cute. I'm shocked that he would have noticed as this is CALEB's teacher, not Sam's. I replied, "Oh yeah, she is pretty cute, isn't she?" Too which he responded, "I wanted to say hi but I felt too shy." He's just 5. And I'm still speechless.